Off to the land I love...

Hey I'm in the Portland airport! In about 40 hours I'll be in the Brazzaville airport! :o)

"We are tragically uncool compared to these people." --Matt Gerber, said while watching a video of my Congolese musician friends

Amber's wedding pics

Here are some more pics on Facebook...

Amber's Wedding

Urgent: cheap digital cameras needed

Hi! Yes, I'm due for a real blog post, but first I have a question...

Anybody out there got a used digital camera to sell? I'm looking for 2 cameras at about $40 each to purchase on behalf of 2 Congolese colleagues. Let me know asap if you do 'cause I leave in just 2 weeks!

Thanks!
Jessica

Living and loving the African life

People ask me all the time if living in Africa is hard. It does have its downsides, most notably the fact that it’s located thousands of miles from my family. The public restrooms are atrocious, and I’m not free to express myself in my mother tongue. Other than that, it’s really not too hard to live there. In fact, I feel that living in Africa facilitates a lot of good things in my life. Here are a few that come to mind:

1) I have easier access to solitude. Because I have a limited network of relationships and because not much happens after 9pm there and because I have my own place and because I don’t have a television, I seem to find more evenings to spend in prayer or doing a creative endeavor or just reading.

2) I am more generous. The Congolese obligate generosity. There are just so many needs and they tell you about them and ask for your help. To be a real friend you have to be giving.

3) I am less of a consumer/garbage generator. There’s just not a whole lot to buy. Things don’t come with as much packaging. I don’t get junk mail. I can give stuff away that I don’t need anymore, including empty jars or plastic bottles.

4) I am constantly improving myself. You just can’t get away with a lot of junk in your life; it comes out ugly under the stress. I am always surrounded by seasoned missionaries who voluntarily mentor me and help me grow. The challenges that I face force me to become a better person.

So yeah, it can be hard. But I wouldn’t trade the benefits for anything. I’m happy to be going back in 4 weeks. In spite of the distance. And the toilets.

Facebook Photos

Check out my new albums on Facebook

Congolese people

Brazzaville daily life

My orphans

Summer 2007

My Congolese Self in America: #2 Church

OK, it must be time to talk about Congo some more. Unfortunately my biggest disappointment in coming back to the States has been church. I just haven’t found the fellowship and worship I was looking forward to. The first Wednesday I was home I went to the evening service at my home church and didn’t know anyone! I went back to the youth group and didn’t know anyone there either! So I ended up leaving early simply because I didn’t have anyone to sit next to. So where does Congo enter in? Well, I’ve been shocked at how many services and different churches I can go to without ever being introduced! (Although there have been exceptions!) I was so used to Congo where when a person comes back from a trip or when a minister visits from out of town, they get a minute to give a report or they are at least greeted from the pulpit. It’s a really big deal for Congolese and I’m used to getting acknowledged quite a bit in church over there. On the other hand, there’s something nice about being able to go to church here and NOT be noticed! :o)

It’s also odd going to church here because it doesn’t feel natural to me anymore. I’ve been to a lot of different churches this summer, but everywhere I see all the cultural traditions we have, rather than just joining in like I used to. I feel like more of an observer than a participant in our huge concert-like services. I notice how nice our buildings are and what elaborate sound systems we have. This is disappointing because I was looking forward to being back home where I wouldn’t have to be distracted by cultural issues in church!

I hesitate to write this entry because I really love a lot of churches here and believe they are doing just what God has called them to. I don’t want to sound like I’m bashing the American church. I’m not, I’m just saying how I see it through my Congolese eyes. I think this is a pretty common experience for missionaries who come home.

I guess if I were really Congolese I’d have a few other things to say—like “People! Get up and move when you sing!” :o) The Congolese would love to hear our beautiful worship songs, but ultimately I think they’d prefer their own music. If I were Congolese I think I’d be very jealous of all the wealth that the church here enjoys and I’d probably ask if they could spare something for the church in Africa! All of the churches I’ve visited are VERY giving, yet I don’t think a Congolese would see that when it’s obvious that those churches still enjoy a great amount of money for themselves. Our wealth and living standards are just so foreign to them.

So I’m left with knowing that even if no single service or church building is going to completely make me feel at home, I’m on the road to my heavenly home and I can get a taste of it no matter where I am when I’m in Jesus’ presence and with His people.

The Joys of Roadtripping

Cathie Jo having way too much fun.
My impersonation of Cathie Jo

Hiller depicting just how hungry we were for In 'n Out Burger

At last!!

Cutest baby In 'n Out's ever seen

Off to Texas

Howdy from PDX. I'm off to Dallas this afternoon with my dear friend Cortney. Came back Monday night from a roadtrip to Sacramento with my mom, sister and sister's kids. Pics to come, my battery is going to die.

PS: Best quote from the roadtrip: Oh no! We forgot the dictionary. How are we going to understand what Mom is saying?

My Congolese Self in America: #1 Transport, Time, Etc.

So people keep asking me questions like “So has anything changed since you came back?” “What’s it like to be home after living in Congo?” Some days I think that nothing has changed at all (after all, it was only a year and a half that I was gone) and other days I feel like I’m on a foreign planet. It’s my perception of things that has changed more than any real change here in Oregon. I want to write about it and describe what I see to you, but I think I’ll have to do it in several installments. Here’s installment #1. Pardon me if I ramble.

It’s funny the things you notice when you come home from a country like Congo. You notice things you never noticed before. Our neighborhood streets are REALLY wide. And they’re paved! Having a car gives you a lot of freedom, which makes life a lot more complicated because there are so many people you can zip over to see and so many things you can zip around to do. In Brazzaville the bus only stops at so many locations, you know? But we still never seem to be able to get where we’re going fast enough. In America being in a hurry and being busy are quite virtuous.

I’ve found that I have a bit more of a cushion of time now. A few minutes doesn’t make a difference to me anymore, so sitting a little longer in traffic or being stuck behind a slow truck doesn’t stress me. Being 10 minutes late is no big deal at all, whether I’m the one who is late (which I usually am) or whether I’m the one waiting for someone else. It stresses me out that for people around me those things are big deals. I’m like, How can you expect someone to be on time right down to the minute? In Congo you make appointments by the hour. If you arrive at 10:59, it’s still 10 o’clock!

I wear a button on my purse that says “I (heart) Congo.” I think it gives me a sense of identity and unity within myself. Like I can drive around this frenetic town and still be the girl who lives in Congo. When I feel like I come from a different planet, I can just point to the pin and be like, “Yeah, I know I’m weird; I just got home from Congo,” and that seems to make sense to me and everybody else.

The Wedding of the Century

A blog about Amber’s 7/7/07 wedding is long overdue! The word to capture the essence of this wedding event is “extravagant.” I doubt if any of the Oregonians present had ever seen anything like it! We relished every moment. It was held at the Resort at the Mountain at Mount Hood in Welches, OR. It was a full 4 days, so I’ll just mention the highlights. Hopefully the photos and my words can do it some sort of justice. I'll post more photos later too.

The bridal party kicked off the weekend on Thursday with a white water rafting trip. Tremendously fun, or “double super gnar gnar” as our rafting guide put it. Yes, everyone thought we were absolutely insane to attempt such a feat just days before the sacred ceremony, but we managed to sustain only very minor injuries.

Thursday night was the rehearsal, followed by a formal dinner overlooking the golf course. Amber presented each of the bridesmaids with a heart necklace from Tiffany’s to wear in the wedding. Amber’s been my friend for 20 years, so I’m thrilled to have this little token that I’ll still be wearing 20 years from now to remember her special day and our dear friendship by.


Friday more of the guests arrived, including my parents, and we had a buffet dinner. In the afternoon we got manicures and pedicures. My person said I had African feet :o) My toes are the darkest part of me!

Saturday we began our beauty treatments bright and early, including professionally done hair and makeup. Not sure any of us have ever looked that good before! Amber was resplendent. It was her best day!
The weather fully cooperated for the outdoor ceremony. One might think that having a whole wedding weekend might detract from the focal point of the ceremony, but not so. It was delightfully done. Our former band director’s husband officiated and he did a great job. It was special to hear him read what Amber and Glenn had written about why they wanted to marry each other. I read a poem called “Indian Wedding Blessing,” the last line of which Amber and Glenn had engraved on their rings: The adventure has just begun. I was thrilled they liked the reading so much!


After the ceremony we had a cocktail hour while the family took pictures with the happy couple. Then the party began. The reception was in a tent which had been transformed into one of the prettiest rooms I’ve ever seen. The food was great, but the highlight was the music and dancing. A FABULOUS band from Portland played, and they were so good you had to see if it was them or a CD playing. The DJ apparently spins for Phil Knight’s (CEO Nike’s) personal parties. Both the band and the DJ played very danceable music like jazz and funk and oldies. All I can say is “wow”!!! SO MUCH FUN!!!!




Sunday morning we closed the event with a buffet brunch. Never seen such a breakfast spread! Have you ever eaten chocolate mousse in the morning? Highly recommended. So that’s about it. It was great to get together with old friends, get all dressed up, and celebrate with Amber and Glenn. I can’t think of a better way to begin a life together. May God bless your union forever!!

Napoleon Sighting

Sweet! I finally feel justified in my claim to fame as coming from the same home town and high school as Jon Heder (aka Napoleon Dynamite). My sister, nephew, neice and I were driving to the Salem Art Fair. As we passed my old high school I noticed 4 cool looking dudes walking down the street with cameras around their necks. I said, "Hey, one of those guys looked like Napoleon Dynamite!" We couldn't find parking so we came back around the block and drove right by the men again. Cathie Jo was like, "Get a good look this time!" She slowed slightly and as I stared out the window, Nappy D himself turned and looked at me. It was a beautiful moment. I have no idea why, but we were very excited about it the rest of the day. Yeah, I know I'm cool.

Mindy's wedding

I'm so glad I was able to be back for my friend Mindy's wedding! It was a delight to be with her on her special day. I'm so happy for Mindy and Lucas--they both waited for God to bring them the right person and purity is a beautiful thing.



I love the blue of the dresses, but this pic already looks outdated to me 'cause I have new glasses! Yeah, when I finally get a new camera (going on 7 months since mine broke) I'll let ya see what they look like. Maybe I'll go for laser surgery next furlough, but for now I'm enjoying my new look.


While Mindy and Lucas went off on their honeymoon, a bunch of us had a blast at a reunion of old church friends. Watch out for the beave!

Home Again Jiggedy Jig

Greetings from beautiful Oregon!

Time has flown by these past 2 weeks in the States. I was the Maid of Honor in a wedding 5 days after I got home, and I'll be a bridesmaid in another wedding this coming weekend, so that has kept be quite busy, but it's been a great opportunity to see lots of old friends.

I was greeted at the airport by my family and friend Carrie, complete with big posters and balloons. It was great.

I'll have to start blogging about all the things I've noticed since coming back before they become commonplace again. I was commenting to my mom today about how ridiculous our very wide paved roads seem to me now. It's awesome being able to drink tap water again. I pretty much only want to listen to Congolese music. I miss the solitude/alone time that I had in Africa, which is funny 'cause that was one of the things that was hardest for me to get used to there. Shopping is pure bliss here.

More later.

Conference

I'm off today for a branch conference. We'll be out at a retreat center until Monday the 11th, so I will be without Internet access until then. I didn't get around to sending out a prayer update, but if you think of me, please be in prayer for this week of important business meetings and for the 3 days of spiritual retreat at the end. I am in charge of planning and coordinating the fun activities for the week, so you can pray that what I have worked on will truly be fun, helping a lot of stressed people to relax and bringing us closer together as a group.

When I return I will have just a week left in Congo to pack up my stuff, tie up all the loose ends, and say my goodbyes before I arrive in Portland on the 18th.

What Congo Has Taught Me #3

People are not interruptions. If you’re working away and someone comes along to talk to you, how to you respond? For an African, this person is more important than the work they were doing. Moreover, the fact that this person crossed your path means that they are God’s will for you in that moment!

I am learning that my relationships with people are actually my most important work here. Even more importantly, I’m realizing that my interactions with people are almost the only thing that counts in God’s eyes. Without those same people who “interrupt” me, it’s impossible to practice love, which is the most important commandment and the only way of making God real amongst us.

In the West we isolate ourselves. We build castles and put hedges around those castles and we close ourselves up inside. If we want to see someone, we let down the drawbridge and extend an invitation. This is known as hospitality.

In Congo you don’t close your door. Anyone could walk through at any moment. A surprise visitor will be offered whatever is available; if you have enough for one, you have enough for two. There’s always time or food or a bed. This is African hospitality.

I have a long way to go before I will value people the way they should be valued.

What Congo Has Taught Me #2

There’s no need to be self-conscious about expressing yourself. I love the way Africans seem able to just sing and dance at just about any old time, whether or not anyone else is participating. You can walk down the street singing at the top of your voice. If you’re talking to someone and a song comes to mind, just sing it out! If you are happy, why not do a little dance?

I think I’m making some progress in this area, mostly because I’ve been persistent in pushing past my comfort zone and have continued to get involved in music here. It’s no longer very difficult to sing for people who want to just hear what my voice sounds like, or to try out a solo part in front of a group of outstanding vocalists. But I’ve still got a long way to go before I’ll be the kind of performer they are! They do everything with their whole heart, no self-consciousness at all.

What Congo Has Taught Me #1

I’ve been realizing lately that I’ve learned a lot of important lessons in the past year. Many good things have come clear to me on account of the stark contrast between the Congolese culture and my own. Overseas living is good for that; you stay in your own culture and you think everything is normal, when in reality there are things about it that aren’t good. Here’s what Congo (mostly the Congolese people themselves) has taught me:

#1 There’s no need to be embarrassed about your body. People here will be like “Hey, you’ve got pimples on your forehead. What’s causing that?” I’m like “Excuse me? Just leave me alone!” But for them it’s not something I need to be embarrassed about. If you’re short they have no problem making fun of it, or you will even make fun of it yourself. If you’re fat it’s just a plain fact everybody can comment on. Some of the things they say about people I find quite insulting, but on the other hand just to be open and honest about bodies is rather refreshing. They simply aren’t embarrassed of their bodies. Here’s a passage from “The Poisonwood Bible” that I really enjoy:

“The lady in the little house that’s pretty close to ours is Mama Mwanza. One time her roof caught on fire and fell on her and brunt up her legs but not the rest of her…Mama says that was the poor woman’s bad luck, because now she has got to go right on tending after her husband and her seven or eight children. They don’t care one bit about her not having any legs to speak of. To them she’s just their mama and where’s dinner? To all the other Congo people, too.

“Used to be Adah was the only one of us in our family with something wrong with her. But here nobody stares at Adah except just a little because she’s white. Nobody cares that she’s bad on one whole side because they’ve all got their own handicap children or a mama with no feet, or their eye put out. When you take a look out the door, why, there goes somebody with something missing off of them and not even embarrassed of it. They’ll wave a stump at you if they’ve got one, in a friendly way.

“Father said, ‘They are living in darkness. Broken in body and soul, and don’t even see how they could be healed.’ Mama said, ‘Well, maybe they take a different view of their bodies.’ Father says the body is the temple. But Mama said to him, ‘Well, here in Africa that temple has to do a hateful lot of work in a day.’ She said, ‘Why, Nathan, here they have to use their bodies like we use things at home—like your clothes or your garden tools or something. Where you’d be wearing out the knees of your trousers, sir, they just have to go ahead and wear out their knees!’”

The Countdown is ON

Hi y'all!

Sorry there hasn't been too much blogage going on these days. I've just been having too much fun in Congo to spend time in front of my computer getting angry at our unreliable and sluggishly slow Internet connection!

Somehow a lot of things have really come together for me the last few months. I'm so much more at ease here than I've ever been, both in my work and with my Congolese friends. Others have remarked on my growth. For about a year everyone (especially myself) have been wondering how in the heck I'll handle being team leader when I come back in October and find myself with two new ladies to work with. But seriously all of a sudden a lot of things have come together for me. I have ideas, I'm asking the right kinds of questions, I feel more confident, I have a positive outlook on the coming year. So I praise the Lord that He knows our needs and does all things well!

Although this new progress makes leaving a bit harder, I'm so so thankful that I can go home looking forward to coming back. I leave in 2 1/2 weeks! I will be in the US (mostly in Oregon) for 3 1/2 months. I'm looking forward to wearing closed-toed shoes, eating cereal with real milk, driving, shopping, and blending into the crowd. Of course the biggest deal will be seeing my family and I am praying that this summer I can be a blessing in the lives of my friends. (See you soon!)

Double cause to celebrate

Hello! Did you know that today is a holiday? Two in fact! First of all, it is Ascension Day. I found out the hard way that it is a holiday...I'm up in my house working away on my computer and I went down for coffee break to find that it hadn't been served. A little annoyed and wondering why the woman who puts the break stuff out didn't show up for work, I wandered over to the office. "Hmmm, that's weird. Why are the gates shut?" I go in and everything is all locked up and no one is there! "Uh, is it a holiday?" I go over to the director's house to find him and his wife and another couple chatting away drinking coffee together. "What?!! Nobody told me! I've been working!" :o)

Read this post from two years ago to find out about today's holiday.

What's the 2nd cause to celebrate? Well, a few days ago Brent and Brock, the director's two kids, were like "May 17th is Miss Jessica Day. We have to respect you all day long." Wow! We joked about it again yesterday and then this morning I heard a little tap at my door. Brent and Brock were there with a plate of steaming hot cinnamon rolls. Mmmmmmmmmmmm!!!!! Brent said, "Even though we tease you a lot we just wanted you to know that we really love you." Wow again! So precious. Pretty thoughtful for 6 and 8 year old boys, doncha think?
I felt kind of bad that I put "Miss Jessica Day" on my calendar when it turned out to be the Ascension! Sorry Jesus! :o) Can you tell from these mischievious photos that a whole day of respect is a big deal? :o)

The Guinea Fowl and the Lion

Lion and Guinea Fowl had been friends for many years. One day, Lion was chosen to be king of the animals. Lion sent one of his children to share the good news with his friend Guinea Fowl. Lion also sent word that he needed to wear a crown decorated with guinea fowl feathers. And so Guinea Fowl was asked to give all his feathers for the king’s crown.
Guinea Fowl was embarrassed and frightened by the request. But what else could he do? He couldn’t refuse. So, with the help of his wife he plucked out all of his feathers and brought them to the king.
As a result, Guinea Fowl was very sick for a long time afterwards, and his family wondered if he might even die. But, little by little, his feathers grew back and he recovered. Over the years Lion and Guinea Fowl remained close friends. One day, Guinea Fowl’s son became very ill, and the only thing that could cure him was a lion’s pelt. But where in the world could he find a lion’s pelt? All of a sudden he remembered his friend Lion, the king.
So Guinea Fowl sent word to Lion to see if he would help them. Poor Lion was embarrassed and frightened by this request, but how could he refuse someone who had demonstrated such close friendship in the past. So Lion began to skin himself... and died in the process.
This story shows us that we should never ask something of a friend that might cost them their life.

My colleague Trista got this story from her French tutor (who was also my Lingala teacher) and after a half hour of discussion with him, she concluded that the message of the story in a Congolese man's eyes is that it's good to ask your friends for things, but you shouldn't ask too much. This is a very good thing for us to know because people are ALWAYS asking for things and it can be really annoying. But if we understand that to them it's acceptable and appropriate, we won't be so offended about it. So far no one has asked me for the skin off my back (although I have been asked for my hair!) so I guess we're doing OK.

Things people ask for include: taking them to the States, helping them find an education program (abroad or by correspondence), food, money, medicine, English lessons, phone credits, something you're wearing that they like, bus or taxi fare, etc. The person asking could be your best friend or someone on the street. I generally don't give anything to people I don't know (families are big here, they should be asking their relatives if they're really in need) but managing friends' requests is a little harder. If I follow my African colleagues' example, I will help people in need whenever I have the ability to do so. I am like a big sister to all my jobless musician friends so it's my role to help them out.

But it's not always easy to accept. Imagine if your good friends started coming to you all the time asking for things! You would get mad or feel used. It's the same for me except I have to tell myself to interpret it differently. Sometimes I succeed and sometimes I don't. But I'm learning.