Showing posts with label my wedding. Show all posts
Showing posts with label my wedding. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

First Anniversary photos

Hey everybody! Sorry for my disappearance these past few months. I was vomiting most of the time, so you'll have to forgive me :o)

Here are some lovely photos of my first wedding anniversary celebration with Esperance this past weekend.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Name giving

I recently received this comment on my last post:

Okay, Madame Kouka, explain to all of us about names. If your husband had married a Congolese woman, how would the naming go? In other words, would someone from Congo have taken the husband's name as their last name like you did? And what are all your husband's names? Is his last name his father's first name like so many African conventions? Just how does all this go?
Curious Ted

Just thought others would be interested too, so I'm making my reply its own post. First of all, I have chosen to take the name Kouka, but legally (i.e. on my passport, etc.) I'm also keeping my maiden name just to facilitate things (since I have some documents in my former name and what not). But please feel free to use just my married name in your correspondence with me. I will be changing my email in the near future.

I confess I do not know all the ins and outs of name giving in Congo. Kouka is my (deceased) father-in-law's family name, which my mother-in-law also took on when she married him. Esperance does not carry his mother's maiden name. Espe's dad's name was acutally Nkouka, which is a common family name here, but for some reason he dropped the N when he gave the name to his children.

I think name giving is changing in the modern Congo. Previously you could just make up a name for your child so there was no family lineage traced through the name, but rather your name meant something (like something about the circumstances of your birth). But now I think more people are using the practice of passing along a family name. I haven't heard of anyone here using their father's first name as a last name. People tend to have lots of first and middle names (like 3 or 4!). One funny thing is that people's names are often spelled weird because the person who filled out their birth certificate made an error. I can't imagine anyone putting up with that in the US!

Traditionally it needed to be a wise older person in the family who gave the baby its name. And they needed to wait a few weeks to see what the baby was like in order to give the appropriate name. I don't think people in the cities practice this anymore, although some people give their children both a French name and a traditional name. There are also certain names given to twins and to the child who comes after a set of twins, although these are sometimes just nicknames and not officially given. I think there is also a name given to a child whose mother dies in childbirth.

Yes, when women marry here they tend to take their husband's name. Everyone has automatically started calling me Madame Kouka without ever asking if I was taking that name or not. Thanks for the interesting question. I'll ask Esperance to fill me in on the details of name-giving in his culture when I get home from work today!

Wednesday, December 09, 2009

More wedding photos

Hey everybody! It's fun reading your comments on my Facebook photos. So much so I'm willing to painstakingly post them with my slow Internet connection. Here is another set of pics from the wedding. Enjoy!

Sunday, November 08, 2009

More photos

OK, I finally posted some photos of the wedding! Enjoy them here: My big fat congolese wedding album

Thursday, November 05, 2009

Wedding photos

If you haven't already seen them, here are the pics my friend Amber posted on Facebook from her trip here to Congo and of my wedding: Amber's Congo album.

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

my shower cake


My amazing sister-in-law Nancy hosted a bridal shower for my friends and family and ordered a cake that looks like my wedding cloth! I was able to attend the party via video Skype, although I didn't get to taste the dessert :o)










Saturday, October 03, 2009

Wedding Invitation


OK, folks, this is as close as we're gonna get to taking engagement photos. It was for the purpose of creating our wedding invitation. This is the pic we used for that. To see the others go to my Facebook album.




Here are the other graphics on the invitation. I think it's so cute! The heart is cut out in the middle and the picture of us shows through.

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

My wedding pagne


Many people have been asking about my wedding preparations here and what the differences are between a Congolese and an American wedding. One of my favorite aspects of African weddings is the "wedding pagne" (pronounced pawn-yuh), a cloth chosen for the event which people can buy and have outfits made to wear to the wedding. Oftentimes different cloths are chosen for different sides of the family or for different groups. Heather and I chose this cloth for my work colleagues and other missionaries to wear. Fun!

This is a wedding pagne Heather and I wore a couple months ago.